a.k.a. "The Oscar Messenger"

Posts tagged ‘Emma Watson’

Pee Wee spreads FUN whilst Harry Potter spreads utter boredom!

Well, there’s a clear choice for New Yorkers who really want a bit of genuine holiday joy this festive-approaching season. Either you take you and your loved ones to “Pee Wee Playhouse” now on Broadway in a magnificent re-incarnation of the television show, in which the magic word is FUN! Directed by the same wizard/director who has just given Broadway IN THE SAME WEEK, the wonderful “Bloody, Bloody Andrew Jackson” Alex Timbers, “Pee Wee’s Playhouse” on Broadway is just a joy to behold! And to experience!

OR you can drag yourself to, or get dragged to, by Harry Potter enthusiasts, who will be the only ones who will enjoy the deadly 2 and a half hours of  utter stultification that consumes one as one enters “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, Part One”

 NOhO! Does that means there’s a PART TWO?!?!? When is this torture ever going to END?????

As Pee Wee Herman would scream, “HEEEEEEELP!”

I only went to see this one because the buzz was that it was one of the best Harry Pooters ever. And instead, what do I find out the hard way? It’s one of the worst!

Why is it so bad? Because it is so DULLLLLL. Virtually nothing happens. Though there are the requisite special effects, they seem small and dull.

WHO CARES?!?!

Yes, Harry and co. are no longer imprisoned in Hogwarts, though perhaps they should be. They are out of school and being thrown into the cold, cruel world of “Deathly Hollows” in which the operative word is “DEATH” as in dead boring. Or maybe it’s “Hollow” as in “There’s nothing there.”

Working with an extremely muted palate, Harry, Hermione and Ron Weasley and a group of real trees swathed in mist, are the only living things in Pooterville this time around. And although Danielle Radcliffe is turning into a first-rate, energetic young actor, as is Rupert Grint, they are not enough to kick-start this D.O.A. franchise back to life. IF it ever had any life to begin with.

It must be the experience of the books. Which I found unreadable and derivative. Because the movies started out as sort of OK and steadily got worse until I swore around #4 or so, that I would never see one again. And I didn’t til I got suckered by hype into this one. Which is something like #7, oh no!

Motto is “Don’t believe Hype, dear ones” dear readers, dear cineastes. Just don’t.Or do so at your own peril.

Harry, Ron and Hermione(whose acting deteriorated as the film dragged on. Emma Watson! Take some acting lessons, girl!) became insufferable, stuck-up little self-righteous bores as the film wore on and on and on and on….zzzz

How did this ever become a multi-billion dollar franchise? The biggest one in Hollywood History. This is the seventh and would’ve been the last, and it isn’t because of the dreaded PART TWO, which may have perhaps a smidgen more action than the dulldulldull Part One. It boggles the mind. Or rather numbs it, because it is totally incomprehensible. The triumph of mediocrity is the only way I can explain it.

Compared to “Lord of the Rings” this is utter…well, I was going to say, nonsense, but there’s not a dollp of fun or one laugh in it. Although it does have the witchiest witch imaginable Bellatrix La Strange. As personified by the She’s-EVERYwhere Helena Bonham-Carter who tries with whips and snakes to kill these unbearable urchins. But unfortunately after something like ten minutes, they defeat and kill her! Oh cripes!

Give me Pee Wee Herman any day! More on him soon!

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